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Hey there, fucker. It's me, your favorite person, Pink Ace. Are you here to hear about my activism? Or to get advice on where to find the best macaroon shops in Cincinnati? Maybe you'd like to hear about the books I've gotten from the library? I can sell them to you for cheap!
Oh.
No, that's not why you're here, is it?
*[[It isn't.]]You came here for drama, right? You're here to listen to every story I've got about the worst person I've ever met, correct? You didn't come here asking for joyous positivity, you wanted me to air my dirty laundry? Is that what you want? You piece of shit?
*[[Yeah, that's what I want.]]Okay, fine.
Here's a story for you. This one is about my old paramour, [[Lizzie Smithson.->ActualStoryIntro]]
*[[Wait, I want popcorn first.]]You should've thought about that before you acted like an electoral apologist.
*[[Fine, I'll wait till you're done.->ActualStoryIntro]] CHAPTER 1
So in 2020, I was abused by a member of the Hillburg Queer Community. Their name was Lizzie Smithson. You'd know them by their awful fucking [[top hat.]]
I seethe every time I think of that bitch, but I'll [[calm down]] for a second so I can explain why they are, in literally scientific terms, the worst.
Two examples:
1) [[Lizzie Smithson financially abused me when we were together->financial abuse]]
2) [[Lizzie Smithson kicked me out when they were done with me, and made me homeless->Homeless]]
*[[I've read both examples and am ready to move on now.->ActualStory2]]That fucking top hat! I can not understand what motivated them to think that shit looked cool. And the monocle! I guess it's a good outfit to wear if you want your romantic partner to feel like they're dating fucking Henry Ford.
[[Anyway.->ActualStoryIntro]](For the record, you should never, ever, EVER tell somebody to calm down when they're hurting, or you're basically a freud supporter.)
[[Anyway.->ActualStoryIntro]]Lizzie Smithson was CONSTANTLY stealing money from me. Daily. Multiple times a day, even. That's basically all they did.
*[[Really?->financialabuse2]]So this is fast forwarding through our relationship somewhat, but it's easily the worst thing they ever did, so here it goes.
In 2021, after they'd gone through me like a wet tissue, I guess they decided they were bored of me, and their lease renewed.
[[AND.->homeless2]]Absolutely.
This is, of course. A method of control. You know what happens to somebody when they don't have enough money to escape you?
*[[They can't escape.->financialabuse3]]Exactly! Lizzie Smithson is an abuser, ergo the things they do, primarily, are abuse.
*[[Why didn't you stop them?->financialabuse4]]FUCK YOU.
You think I just let them do that? I NEVER gave them money when they asked, no matter how good a reason they thought they had for asking it. They had a whole SQL database of excuses, too!
An ENDLESS supply of excuses, of every possibility imaginable! Come on, bitch! I know you don't think I deserve nice things for myself, but that doesn't mean you have to TELL me!
*[[Did they not have money?->financialabuse5]]YES THEY FUCKING DID.
It wasn't just me they were stealing from! They stole from EVERYBODY! If you've ever met Lizzie, they probably stole something from you! That's what they do!
*[[They STOLE from ME???->financialabuse6]]Probably. It was, like, their job.
*[[Is that all they did?->financialabuse9]]Nope! I've got tons more stories.
Go ahead, ask to hear any of them.
*[[Okay.->ActualStoryIntro]][[THEY.->homeless3]][[LEFT.->homeless4]][[ME.->homeless5]][[OFF.->homeless6]][[OF.->homeless7]][[*IT.*->homeless8]]REALLY!
They left me off the lease when it renewed, and because of THAT, they were allowed to tell the landlord to kick me out! I was HOMELESS, because of LIZZIE!
*[[That's awful!->homeless9]]Isn't it???
That's why I'm making this game. If they did it to me, they've probably been doing it to everyone they've ever fucked! They're probably going to KEEP doing it!
Do you think I'm okay with that?
Are YOU okay with that?
I didn't have a HOME!
I had nowhere to *GO*!
Like, fuck.
So we have to stop them! We have to stop them! Do you hear me? Understand?
*[[Yeah, let's kick their ass!->homeless10]]So glad we're on the same page.
And I'm not even done with stories about my abuser! I've got tons more to say, they ruined my life. Wanna hear more? Then keep playing.
*[[Okay.->ActualStoryIntro]] CHAPTER 2
So you're probably wondering why I ever even give that fucker the time of day, right?
*[[You could say that.->ActualStory3]]Alright. So let me tell you how we met.
I was down by the bar, and they were there, and I was drinking. And I guess our eyes met, and they [[approached me.->ActualStory4]]I'm sure I gave them the stink eye, because I know jackasses when I see them, but I was feeling friendly and drunk, and [[decided to give them the time of day,->ActualStory5]] like some sort of idiot. [[I know better now.->nogood]]And we talked for a bit, about meaningless things. I think we were talking about videogames, as if anyone gives a shit. Yeah, your life is so much better with those capitalist tchotchkes you keep spending money on. Don't got anything better to buy, huh? Well, that's very sad, but maybe someday you can [[find some more meaning in your life.->aside]] And eventually, I think they asked me [[to go home with them.->LizzieChoice]] Or maybe [[it was me that asked them.->PinkChoice]] I don't remember. Like I said, drunk.Obviously, if it WAS Lizzie who asked me, I did so reluctantly. It's not a decision I would make if it happened now, but I guess at the time I was young and stupid, and Lizzie was an expert at [[getting people into their web.->ActualStory6]]Obviously, if it WAS me I did it purely out of sympathy. I felt sorry for that rotten bitch and their terrible [[hat,->Hat2]] and boy howdy did they ever milk my sympathy for all it was [[worth.->ActualStory6]]I don't remember what happened that night. I guess we had sex, or maybe we just fell asleep on the couch watching their stupid [[internet shows.]] In any case, we stuck together after that, and dated for a whole year, over the course of which I got all these stories I'm telling you now. I'm lucky they dumped me when they did, or I'd have even more stories.
If they had the chance, they would've broken me into smaller and smaller pieces. The smallest pieces possible.
*[[Are you angry?->ActualStory6.5]]You already had a chance to ask about the hat, you moron! I'm not repeating myself.
*[[Okay.->PinkChoice]]Lizzie had the worst fucking taste in entertainment. Like, god damn. The only thing they would watch is twitch streams of the shoutingiest people on Earth playing videogames! You have all this money you stole from me, you bitch! Buy your own videogames and play them yourself! We all know it's the one thing in your pathetic life giving you a sense of purpose. Asshole.
[[Anyway.->ActualStory6]] CHAPTER 3
So maybe you're wondering. How did this happen? What broke in Lizzie Smithson's brain that made them like this? It didn't happen for no reason at all, surely?
Well, I have my [[theory.->mb1]]Yeah you get it. So you see, when I call Lizzie an abuser, that's not just ME saying that. It's a statement backed by SCIENCE.
But enough about that. You're here to hear all the juicy gossip, right? [[Here you go.->ActualStory7]] CHAPTER 4
You thought I was out of stories? Ho ho ho, I'm just getting started.
The thing to remember about the type of abuse Lizzie Smithson performs on people, is that it's long term. It's not just any one thing for a short period of time, it's DOZENS of things, for MONTHS ON END. So if these next two bullet points don't sound too bad to you, I assure you that, to me, for how long I had to deal with them, they are EXACTLY as bad as all the other stuff I mentioned.
Anyway.
1) [[Made fun of me for liking Lego.->lego1]]
2) [[Was insensitive about my allergies.->icecream1]]
*[[I've read everything and am ready to proceed.->ActualStory8]]Okay, the thing you need to understand about me is: I LOVE lego. No, I, REALLY, LOOOOOOOOVE Lego.
*[[I like Lego too! It's great.->lego2]] CHAPTER 5
This is just a quick summary of the abuse I suffered while with them. I didn't even tell you about all their petty rivalries, their awful enabling friends, the endless sob stories about their family, their bitching about how I "[[don't shower enough,]]" but we can move on now.
*[[So what happened next?->ActualStory9]]INFODUMP: I have a milk allergy! When I eat yogurt or cheese or anything else, it makes my stomach feel like [[DEATH.->painting]] I have to take my life very seriously, because society is not kind to people with my disability. And do you wanna know who ELSE isn't kind about my lactose intolerance?
*[[MY MOM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!]]
*[[Lizzie Smithson...?->icecream2]]There's no way on Earth you understand for real, but we'll move on.
You wanna know who DIDN'T like Lego? Like, at all? And who made sure I knew it every chance they got?
*[[Was it Lizzie?->lego3]]YOU BET YOUR [[ASS.->lego4]]They always discouraged me from buying more [[Lego sets->StarWars]]! The one thing that made me happy! Like YOU were doing such a good job at that, Lizzie.
*[[You deserve to be happy!->lego5]]I'm pleased you think so.
They wouldn't let me spend MY money, which I'd EARNED FAIR AND SQUARE, on Lego! Or sometimes, they'd let me buy ONE little thing, and they'd take my money to spend on stupid bullshit, [[I don't even know.->rent]] As if they couldn't already afford rent! And as if I can't make my OWN purchasing decisions! I'm not a child, you BITCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
[[I've got more stories, if you want to hear them.->ActualStory7]](Not that it did me any good.)
[[Anyway.->ActualStory4]]You know, I was never angry my whole life until five minutes ago, when I started thinking about all this.
[[So let's talk more about Lizzie.->psychology1]]Their *favorite* excuse was that they were spending the money on rent. Yeah, like you don't already make enough money for rent with all the CRIMES you do. Like my LEGO MONEY was really the one thing keeping the landlord off your abusive ass. You should be in prison!
*[[Really?->rent2]]Not for the crimes, for the Lego thing.
[[Anyway.->lego5]]My faaavorite sets were the "Lego Mindstorms" series they made in the 2000s. You could make little robots! And program them! And they would actually move around! Like robots! They [[discontinued it]] a long time ago. But they make lots of other good stuff, it's not like there aren't lots of Lego sets I also like, but that one was special. We need to go back to that.
[[Anyway->lego4]]Don't get me started. I could talk about this all day, but we're here to discuss my abuser. I WISH I was talking about Lego, but some other time. Maybe.
[[Anyway.->lego4]]There's this one painter from the Renaissance period, who used to paint all these Where's Waldo style landscapes of what he thought Hell was like, and it was filled with all these people suffering in different ways... ah, I'll look him up later and edit [[his name->incorrectName1]] in here.
ANYWAY, those paintings are what my stomach feels like when I drink milk. I need to lie down for like 8 hours if I do, it's awful.
*[[So sorry.->icecream1]]You are so fucking funny.
*[[Lizzie Smithson, obviously.->icecream2]]Lizzie loved ice cream! They loved it SO FUCKING MUCH. They used to CONSTANTLY eat ice cream at home, and didn't seem to [[understand->icecream3]][[AT ALL->icecream4]]that I was allergic to one of the ingredients! Ice cream has cow's milk in it! They just didn't care! As abusers do, of course.
*[[What did you do???->icecream5]]For what felt like MONTHS, I suffered in silence.
I was struggling at the time, we were both having trouble with money, we both had awful parents.
DESPITE THAT, I was the only one taking the others' feelings seriously.
So one day, I tried to talk with them, and the talk turned into a screaming match. It was a [[nightmare.]]But after a time, I made myself clear. They could either [[leave me->icecream6]], or they could [[stop eating ice cream.->icecream6]]Well, they didn't leave me, much as I wish they had in hindsight.
Not that it did much good! Sometimes, they would have ice cream when I wasn't around, like when they were on the streets and I wasn't with them, they would [[grab a cone from the local pony keg.->secreticecream]]
*[[Why were they like this?->icecream7]]They thought they were being SOOO cool. I knew they were doing it. I could smell it on them. Bitch, if you're reading this, you didn't fool anybody.
[[Anyway.->icecream6]]We've established this! They're an ABUSER. How much clearer can I make this? That's who they are, that's what they do: ABUSE PEOPLE.
*[[It's awful what you've gone though...->icecream8]]Thank you.
And I know, they'll always tell people they were disabled too. To this day, they insist they have [["schizophrenic personality disorder,"]] but that justifies nothing. What they put me through is HELL, and I want to hold them accountable. That's what this game is for! Just so we're on the same page.
*[[I want to hold them accountable too.->icecream9]]Yeah, as if that's not something ANYBODY can fake with a few minutes of research. Sure. I can believe that. lol
*[[lol->icecream8]]Fuck yeah.
[[I've got more stories if you're interested, or we can just move on.->ActualStory7]]Glad you asked! Let's go through this one at a time.
1) [[What happened to me->pinkslife]]Since they dumped me, I've been doing... pretty shit! After Lizzie kicked me out, I had to move back in with my abusive mom, and her award winningly massive polycule (also abusive). I've got lots of stories about those guys too, but I'll save that for a [[future game.]]
*[[What else happened?->ActualStory10]]Here's a preview: FUCK YOU MOM
*[[Looking forward to it!]]Glad you asked! Let's go through this one at a time.
1) [[What happened to me->pinkslife]]
2) [[What happened to Lizzie->lizzielife]]Thanks!
[[Anyway->pinkslife]]Lizzie is still abusing people! Can you believe it! They've found another victim, this one's in a WHEELCHAIR. Between me and her, they really love preying on the most vulnerable members of society, huh? Almost like they've got some sort of [[problem.]] Nah, couldn't be. That can't be it.
*[[What else happened?->ActualStory11]]Abuse. Their problem is abuse. They're an abuser. I don't know if you've gathered that, based on everything you've read so far. Sorry.
*[[Oh, right.->lizzielife]]Glad you asked! Let's go through this one at a time.
1) [[What happened to me->pinkslife]]
2) [[What happened to Lizzie->lizzielife]]
3) [[What happened to Lizzie's new wheelchair girlfriend.->newGFlife]] CHAPTER 6
Okay. Here's the point of this whole essaygame. Lizzie's [[new girlfriend->warning01]].Lizzie is not kind. Lizzie is not responsible. Lizzie will take the pieces that make you... and shatter them into dust. They will control every aspect of your life, they will give you no option to escape, and they will suck you dry. They will suck you dry. They will suck you dry.
[[Do you understand?->warning2]]So I'm not asking you, I'm TELLING YOU, for your own well-being: Get away from them. Break up with Lizzie, leave their apartment, be homeless for a few weeks if you have to, until new housing presents itself. You've GOT to get away. Your life, heart, and soul all depend on it. You know what a [[soul->warning3]] is, don't you?soul /sōl/
noun
The thing [[abusers->warning4]] eat.And Lizzie is an abuser.
[[...->ActualStory11.5]] CHAPTER 7
[[So where does that leave us?->ActualStory13]][[This should not be allowed to continue.->ActualStory14]][[I've told you everything I can. Everything I know.->ActualStory15]][[The rest is up to you.->ActualStory16]][[So...->ActualStory17]]What do you want to do?
No. Better question.
What do you want [[ME->finalchoice]] to do?*[[You should get back together with Lizzie again.]]
*[[You should never be romantically involved with anyone else ever again.]]
*[[You should date... ~me~?]]WHAT???
You think I should become Lizzie's girlfriend AGAIN, after EVERYTHING I've just told you???
Despite her crimes???
Despite her abuse??????
REALLY????????????????????????
Is THAT what you're telling me???
*[[Absolutely!->lizzieEnding]]
*[[Wait, no.->badEnding]]You... want me to be single? You don't think there's any happiness out there for me? Do you mean to tell me... Lizzie was RIGHT, and I can't ever find anybody better than them in this world...?
*[[Fuck you. Of course, yes.->aloneEnding]]
*[[On second though, never mind.->badEnding]]Oh! *blushes* Well, I don't know... you don't think I'm broken goods? You think I can still find happiness... with you? You would treat me right? You would fix everything about me Lizzie broke? *gets teary eyed, looks at you longingly*
*[[Yes, beautiful.->youEnding]]
*[[HA HA NO FUCK YOU->badEnding]]Downtrodden, I return to Lizzie and offer myself to them. They greedily accept, continuing their abuse on me until the day I die.
In particular, they sign me up as an organ donor without my knowledge, and then encourage me to walk slightly off the sidewalk, on the street. Or sometimes they'll tell me to cross the crosswalk on a red light. Or, generally, they'll encourage me to jaywalk, even if it's not faster. I have a long series of close calls with automobiles, but, much to Lizzie's frustration, I never get hit.
So they begin their final abuse: One day, they'll tell me they took all of my Lego money and used it to buy their own car.
"But Lizzie," I protest, "Car ownership is colonialist in the same way that chattel slavery is!"
"Shut the fuck up," Lizzie says.
GAME OVER
[[THE END]]YOU LIAR! YOU PIECE OF INHUMAN TRASH!
*tortures you to death with pliers*
Heh... idiot.
GAME OVER
[[THE END]]And so, crying, I crawl into my bed, under the covers, and lay, eyes wide open and staring at the ceiling. I stop eating. I stop drinking. I don't even sleep. After a few days, you get bored of watching me, and go home to your wealthy aristocrat parents. The day after you leave, my body quits on me and I dissolve into an ashy pile of dust over several hours. You never hear about this, though. Nobody ever does. It's like I never existed.
And isn't that what all of you always wanted?
GAME OVER
[[THE END]]We grasp hands together and kiss passionately. The marks on my skin vanish, and I am once again perfect, thanks to your selfless kindness. We then proceed to have passionate, violent sex every hour of every day for the rest of our immortal lives.
GAME OVER
[[THE END]]I mean, I guess you could've if your passion for life wasn't ABUSE.
[[Anyway.->ActualStory5]]The Myers–Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) is a personality test, backed by real science, that categorizes every aspect of a person's personality. It's useful for finding appropriate employment, proper meditation techniques for the individual, and, important for us today, [[romantic partners.->mb2]]I've known my Myers Briggs personality for a long time. It's ISFP, or "Introverted Sensing Feeling Perception" personality type. For me, this makes the best personality type for a romantic partner for me somebody with an EXTROVERTED personality, or a type beginning with "E." Understand?
*[[Yes.->mbyes]]
*[[No...?->mbno]]Excuse me, obviously you would have never played this game if you didn't already know all about it, hehe.
*[[So... what personality type did Lizzie have?->mb3]]Oh, just google it. (DON'T USE GOOGLE. Use Bing instead, stupid.)
*[[So... what personality type did Lizzie have?->mb3]][[Lizzie...->mb4]][[HAD...->mb5]][[...->mb6]]Lizzie had ISFJ.
An ISFP and and ISFJ...do you see the [[problem?->mb7]]
*[[Oh God, that's awful!->psychology2]]Well, let me explain it for your amusement.
First of all, Lizzie is an INTROVERTED personality type, right? What did I just tell you about ISFPs?
[[Wait for it...->mb8]]We need EXTROVERTED partners!
--EXTROVERTED!!!!!!!!!!!!--
*[[God.->mb9]]The fact that Lizzie, as an introvert, was even THINKING about dating me reveals a severe personality flaw not accounted for by Myers Briggs. It's unthinkable! They had [[something wrong with them.]] I [[swear->mb10]].I'll give you a hint as to what that thing was: (They were an ABUSER.)
[[Anyway->mb9]]But let's get into the biggest DIFFERENCE between our personalities.
See that "J" at the end of ISFJ?
*[[Yes?->mb11]]That stands for "JUDGING."
*[[Oh?->mb12]]Judging types, according to the people that made the test, "Have matters settled."
In other words, they think they know everything. They think they have CONTROL. You see how that might lend itself to a little thing called [[abuse?->mb13]]The "P" in my ISFP type refers to "Perceptive."
Perceptive types, again according to science, "Keep decisions open."
We can make changes, right?
We're FLEXIBLE.
OBVIOUSLY.
[[And that makes us the perfect victims.->mb14]]Judging types are also associated with "Thinking" and "Feeling"... Lizzie, according to the test, is a thinking and feeling type. Well, self centered much?
*[[What about YOU, Pink Ace?->mb15]]So glad you asked.
PERCEPTIVE TYPES, like me, rely on "sensing" and "intuition"...
In other words, we're sensitive to our surroundings, and to other people, and to the things that really matter!
You can see how that would give us a strong sense of empathy, right?
A sense of empathy that an [[ABUSER...->mb16]][[could take advantage of?->psychology2]]I've spoken to Lizzie's new girlfriend a few times, mostly in secret. [[She knows who I am.->warning02]]The first time I told her about my abuse, she took me [[seriously->warning03]][[...at first.->warning04]]But with each allegation I gave, her eyes grew darker. She got less responsive. At first I thought she was overwhelmed with the weight of my accusations. We parted ways, and I figured she would dump the bitch at the nearest [[opportunity.->warning05]][[She didn't.->warning06]][[She didn't believe me.->warning07]]I've tried to reach her a bunch of times since then, but she doesn't listen. She doesn't care. Well, that can't be right... but they're [[still together.->warning08]]I like to believe in the best in people. I like to believe that people, even if we don't see eye to eye, [[can change.]] I believe in Lizzie's wheelchair girlfriend, I believe in her power to improve her own life. Even if she doesn't.
[[...->warning09]]And yes, maybe even Lizzie can change too, right? At the very least, there's no reason they couldn't develop a better [[fashion sense.]]
[[Anyway.->warning08]]So with any luck, this game will reach her. To Lizzie's current girlfriend, if you're reading this, I give you one final oppourtunity to save yourself.
Here goes.
This is my last statement: [[You need to listen to what I am saying.->warning]][[Replay Game->Start]]
<a href="https://megacincinnati.com/games">Back to Games Page</a>
<a href="https://megacincinnati.com/">Back to Main Page</a>YES I'M STILL TALKING ABOUT THE HAT. [[FUCK YOU.->warning08]]It was [[Mary Cassatt!->incorrectName2]]No it wasn't. Sorry, I've been drinking.
[[Anyway->painting]]Showering cumulatively uses as much water as generative AI! You fools! You ignoramuses! If you have a problem with generative AI but don't have a problem with showering, what are you even DOING?
*[[You're right!->ActualStory8]]You can tell, right?
[[...->ActualStory11.6]]I mean, you're reading this, aren't you?
[[...->ActualStory11.7]]Look what they did to me.
[[...->ActualStory12]]